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The Impossible Pantisocracy of Nuweland

“Die hele aarde is aan Nuweland onderworpe!”

Overview • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Impossible Pantisocracy of Nuweland is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Ignacio Quaresma with an even hand, and notable for its compulsory vegetarianism, prohibition of alcohol, and complete absence of social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 40.658 billion Nuwelanders are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, corrupt, socially-minded government prioritizes Education, although Law & Order, Environment, and Social Policy are also considered important, while Defense and Spirituality receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Hammersdorf-Vilamartel. The average income tax rate is 94.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Nuwelandian economy, worth a remarkable 8,351 trillion euros a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is dominated by the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Pizza Delivery, and Cheese Exports. Average income is an amazing 205,412 euros, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Orphans would rather live their life of luxury than be adopted by prospective parents, tabloids publicly shun nurses for not calling home on the weekends, citizens have to dodge their neighbors' drones while getting the morning paper, and elections are won by the candidate who makes the best 'yo mama' jokes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Nuweland's national animal is the ring-tailed lemur, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is 'Christianity' à la neulandienne.

Nuweland is ranked 286,415^th in the world and 1,402^nd in Europe for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring -16.04 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.

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