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The Sun-Scorched Saxon Kingdom of Esplandia

“Until the End, Never Broken”

Overview • Factbook • Dispatches • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Sun-Scorched Saxon Kingdom of Esplandia is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Emperor Irwin IV with an iron fist, and notable for its fear of technology, rampant corporate plagiarism, and restrictive gun laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 18.802 billion Esplandians are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, pro-business, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Industry, although Education, Environment, and Healthcare are also considered important, while Law & Order and Social Policy are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Karþied. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 49.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Esplandish economy, worth a remarkable 3,840 trillion Scylds a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Cheese Exports industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Basket Weaving, and Gambling. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 204,251 Scylds, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,845,387 per year while the poor average 2,725, a ratio of 677 to 1.

Only the brainiest citizens become academics, scaffolding is built around scaffolding to give safe access, the nation's peacekeeping efforts usually come with a healthy dose of pillaging, and many are questioning Emperor Irwin IV wearing an Eckie-Ecola baseball cap during a keynote speech. Crime is moderate, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Esplandia's national animal is the Falcon, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Eallostianism.

Esplandia is ranked 847^th in the world and 21^st in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring 276.52 on the Scary Big Number Scale.

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