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The Rustling Leaves of New Kvenland

“The bycatch of history”

Category: Left-wing Utopia
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:
World Benchmark

Location: Forest

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner


The Rustling Leaves of New Kvenland is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by People's Commissary Tova Olthuis with a fair hand, and remarkable for its smutty television, irreverence towards religion, and hatred of cheese. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 14.827 billion New Kvenlanders are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, liberal, outspoken government prioritizes Education, with Environment, Healthcare, and Welfare also on the agenda, while Spirituality receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Brödstad. The average income tax rate is 98.8%.

The frighteningly efficient New Kvenlander economy, worth a remarkable 2,579 trillion labor vouchers a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 173,988 labor vouchers, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Super Barry Brothers is the most popular video game in the nation, hay has been added to school cafeteria menus, New Kvenlanders submit requests for a date in writing with an enclosed RSVP card, and at least 1% of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs budget goes to People's Commissary Tova Olthuis's wardrobe. Crime is totally unknown. New Kvenland's national animal is the caribou, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Sarkicism.

New Kvenland is ranked 238,426th in the world and 443rd in Forest for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring -23.75 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.

Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 611thLargest Welfare Programs: 785thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 796thLeast Corrupt Governments: 869thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 894thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 896thMost Advanced Public Education: 905thMost Pacifist: 1,016thSafest: 1,228thMost Compassionate Citizens: 1,301stNicest Citizens: 1,369thMost Inclusive: 1,430thMost Developed: 1,464thMost Beautiful Environments: 1,485thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 1,638thBest Weather: 1,653rdHighest Average Tax Rates: 1,706thLongest Average Lifespans: 1,881stMost Advanced Public Transport: 2,263rdHealthiest Citizens: 2,266thSmartest Citizens: 2,332ndMost Cheerful Citizens: 2,340thTop
Largest Governments: 2,455thMost Cultured: 2,964thLowest Crime Rates: 3,858thHighest Poor Incomes: 4,352ndMost Rebellious Youth: 4,640thLargest Publishing Industry: 5,610thHighest Economic Output: 6,028thMost Subsidized Industry: 6,649thMost Scientifically Advanced: 6,815thMost Valuable International Artwork: 7,333rdMost World Assembly Endorsements: 7,794thLargest Information Technology Sector: 8,184thHighest Average Incomes: 9,917thMost Efficient Economies: 11,007thTop
Largest Populations: 17,000thMost Influential: 17,790thMost Secular: 18,583rdMost Politically Free: 18,957th
Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 8th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 12th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 15th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 17th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 22nd in the regionLeast Corrupt Governments: 23rd in the regionMost Politically Free: 24th in the regionTop
Safest: 25th in the regionMost Developed: 26th in the regionMost Pacifist: 27th in the regionMost Inclusive: 30th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 30th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 31st in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 33rd in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 34th in the regionNicest Citizens: 34th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 34th in the regionLargest Governments: 37th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 37th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 37th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 40th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 41st in the regionMost Extensive Civil Rights: 45th in the regionLargest Populations: 48th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 49th in the region

National Happenings

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World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 14 » Ruinenlust, The Cypher Nine, Verdant Haven, Terrabod, Einswenn, Kawastyselir, Democratic Republic of Cacusia, Anachronolandia, Lura, Daarwyrth, Novian Republics, Atsvea, East Skirsburg, and The World Wildlife Fund.