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“Воля або смерть`”

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The People's Republic of Malarus is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Victor Yanukovich with an iron fist, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, infamous sell-swords, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 3.046 billion Malarussians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kiyev. The average income tax rate is 23.6%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The large but inefficient Malarussian economy, worth 128 trillion Roubles a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Pizza Delivery, and Retail. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 42,264 Roubles, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Half-submerged and flooded seaside hotels are technically still next to the beach, epileptic patients switch their medications to whichever has a 'buy one get one free' offer, major cities shut down as their local sports team takes to the field every day, and truancy is as easy as clicking a camera icon. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Malarus's national animal is the Bear, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Orthodox Christianity.

Malarus is ranked 224,577^th in the world and 9^th in Suvo for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring 230.24 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.