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The Utterly Awesomenessismatron of Evil Personz

“I bring you pain, the kind you can't suffer quietly...”

Overview • Factbook • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Utterly Awesomenessismatron of Evil Personz is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Doctor Mad with an iron fist, and remarkable for its ritual sacrifices, strictly enforced bedtime, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 33.21 billion Evil Personzians are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, pro-business, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order and Spirituality are also considered important, while Social Policy and Welfare aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sin City Las Vegas. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 17.3%.

The all-consuming Evil Personzian economy, worth a remarkable 6,557 trillion Human Bloods a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Pizza Delivery. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is an impressive 197,461 Human Bloods, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,492,678 per year while the poor average 7,367, a ratio of 202 to 1.

Dark alleys and public toilets are filled with furtive sexual activities among teenagers and unmarried adults, a survey of the nation's rivers and children has shown that pesticide levels are at an all-time regional high, the government extracts trade concessions from poor nations in exchange for humanitarian aid, and all news sources are under strict government control. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. Evil Personz's national animal is the Flying Evil Monkey, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Discordianism.

Evil Personz is ranked 2,674^th in the world and 7^th in Hell for Highest Disposable Incomes, with 163,301.03 Standard Monetary Units.

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