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“Foreign militias will always love me”

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The Empire of Claboran is a mammoth, orderly nation, ruled by Microbro with an iron fist, and remarkable for its infamous sell-swords, compulsory military service, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 6.848 billion Claboranians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order, Administration, and Education are also considered important, while Social Policy and International Aid are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kemon. The average income tax rate is 95.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Claboranian economy, worth a remarkable 2,675 trillion Mikes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, quite specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Beef-Based Agriculture. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 390,631 Mikes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Students spend the school year learning how great the education system is, spiritual tourists meditate in the ruins of Claboranian cathedrals, fraternities are rejoicing at government-subsidized partying, and the navy is hoping to hear the enemy shout "you sank my battleship!". Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Claboran's national animal is the Laughing gull, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Microbroism.

Claboran is ranked 14,427^th in the world and 739^th in Osiris for Most Cultured, scoring 98 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.