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The Armed Republic of Celtician

“Dílis go Bás”

Category: Psychotic Dictatorship
Civil Rights:
Unheard Of
Political Freedoms:

Location: Lazarus

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner


The Armed Republic of Celtician is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Donn with an iron fist, and notable for its museums and concert halls, free-roaming dinosaurs, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 20.026 billion Celts are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Education, Industry, and Environment also on the agenda. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tech Duinn. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Celticianian economy, worth an astonishing 15,833 trillion Oricalcums a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 790,624 Oricalcums, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.8 times as much as the poorest.

The saying 'break a leg' is now taken literally, minefields are being deployed along the border to discourage potential emigrants from trying to leave, the "boy who cried wolf" policy makes sick people reluctant to call an ambulance, and failed genetic experiments wreak havoc as they roam the countryside. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Celtician's national animal is the Wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is The Order of Donn.

Celtician is ranked 238th in the world and 11th in Lazarus for Largest Basket Weaving Sector, scoring 16,738.34 on the Hickory Productivity Index.

Most Advanced Public Transport: 8thLargest Black Market: 20thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 21stLowest Crime Rates: 25thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 27thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 28thLargest Governments: 36thHighest Average Incomes: 38thMost Corrupt Governments: 41stHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 42ndLargest Manufacturing Sector: 46thMost Subsidized Industry: 47thHighest Average Tax Rates: 49thMost Advanced Public Education: 55thHighest Poor Incomes: 61stLargest Information Technology Sector: 134thHighest Economic Output: 135thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 145thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 238thSmartest Citizens: 258thMost Efficient Economies: 366thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 477thLargest Publishing Industry: 544thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 670thLargest Mining Sector: 1,029thMost Devout: 1,124thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1,180thMost Beautiful Environments: 1,233rdMost Cultured: 1,340thTop
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2,292ndLargest Welfare Programs: 2,324thMost Scientifically Advanced: 2,470thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 2,811thMost Valuable International Artwork: 2,988thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 3,450thMost Authoritarian: 5,080thMost Stationary: 5,979thHealthiest Citizens: 6,166thLargest Populations: 6,404thLargest Agricultural Sector: 8,805thTop
Most Conservative: 11,245thMost Influential: 11,765thMost Developed: 12,231stMost Extreme: 17,487th
Most Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 1st in the regionLargest Governments: 1st in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 2nd in the regionLargest Black Market: 2nd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 2nd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 3rd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 3rd in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 3rd in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 3rd in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 4th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 4th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 5th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 5th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 6th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 8th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 11th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 11th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 16th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 22nd in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 30th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 54th in the regionMost Cultured: 57th in the regionMost Devout: 60th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 62nd in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 70th in the regionTop
Most Stationary: 98th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 99th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 101st in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 113th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 122nd in the regionMost Authoritarian: 142nd in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 164th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 188th in the regionLargest Populations: 189th in the regionMost Extreme: 236th in the regionMost Influential: 277th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 328th in the regionTop
Most Conservative: 423rd in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 487th in the regionMost Developed: 699th in the region

National Happenings

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