Spotlight on:
The Free Land of Really Big Bama Fan |
“Roll Tide Roll”
Category: Corporate Bordello | ||
Civil Rights: Very Good |
Economy: Frightening |
Political Freedoms: World Benchmark |
Location: SEC Fanatics |
Regional Influence: Superpower |
The Free Land of Really Big Bama Fan is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by The Head Coach with a fair hand, and notable for its deadly medical pandemics, daily referendums, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 8.318 billion Really Big Bama Fanians are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.
The tiny, corrupt, pro-business, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Industry, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tuscaloosa. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 1.7%.
The frighteningly efficient Really Big Bama Fanian economy, worth a remarkable 1,551 trillion Crimsons a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Retail, Information Technology, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an impressive 186,573 Crimsons, with the richest citizens earning 6.6 times as much as the poorest.
Molehills are the only mountains deemed safe enough for the public, toilet paper is considered a non-essential item in the embargo against Brasilistan, a primitive society is being eroded as its youth flock to the modern world, and children are often observed making 'sand angels' in bunkers. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Really Big Bama Fan's national animal is the Elephant, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is The Cult of Saban.
Really Big Bama Fan is ranked 3,978th in the world and 1st in SEC Fanatics for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 11,453.54 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- : Really Big Bama Fan agreed to construct embassies between SEC Fanatics and Coven of Witches.
- : Really Big Bama Fan's influence in SEC Fanatics fell from "Dominator" to "Superpower".
- : The Confederate Razorbacks of Arkansas Riceland granted Appearance, Border Control, Communications, Embassies, and Polls authority to Really Big Bama Fan as Successor in SEC Fanatics.
- : Really Big Bama Fan was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Highest Disposable Incomes and Highest Crime Rates and the Top 5% for Highest Average Incomes, Most Scientifically Advanced, and Highest Wealthy Incomes.
- : Following new legislation in Really Big Bama Fan, children are often observed making 'sand angels' in bunkers.
- : Following new legislation in Really Big Bama Fan, a primitive society is being eroded as its youth flock to the modern world.
- : Following new legislation in Really Big Bama Fan, toilet paper is considered a non-essential item in the embargo against Brasilistan.
- : Following new legislation in Really Big Bama Fan, molehills are the only mountains deemed safe enough for the public.
- : Following new legislation in Really Big Bama Fan, juvenile delinquents are fitter than ever.
- : Following new legislation in Really Big Bama Fan, a small country is wondering where their capitol building's gold dome went.