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The Free Land of Really Big Bama Fan

“Roll Tide Roll”

Category: Corporate Bordello
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Location: SEC Fanatics

Regional Influence: Superpower


The Free Land of Really Big Bama Fan is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by The Head Coach with a fair hand, and remarkable for its deadly medical pandemics, pith helmet sales, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 1.757 billion Really Big Bama Fanians are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The tiny government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tuscaloosa. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 4.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Really Big Bama Fanian economy, worth 249 trillion Crimsons a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Retail, Information Technology, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an impressive 141,940 Crimsons, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 446,511 per year while the poor average 34,523, a ratio of 12.9 to 1.

Really Big Bama Fanians have recently stopped mysteriously setting off metal detectors, foreign spirits are hard to find due to an abundance of "Cletus and Jim Bob's Homemade Really Big Bama Fanian Moonshine", re-education centers are being added to most prisons, and the government is more interested in identifying problems than fixing them. Crime, especially youth-related, is pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Really Big Bama Fan's national animal is the Elephant, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is The Cult of Saban.

Really Big Bama Fan is ranked 8,857th in the world and 1st in SEC Fanatics for Most Armed, with 9.6 Weapons Per Person.

Largest Agricultural Sector: 1,643rdHighest Crime Rates: 1,992ndRudest Citizens: 2,151stLargest Soda Pop Sector: 2,211thTop
Lowest Overall Tax Burden: 2,643rdLargest Retail Industry: 2,857thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 3,370thHighest Disposable Incomes: 3,464thFattest Citizens: 4,119thMost Rebellious Youth: 5,842ndHighest Wealthy Incomes: 7,891stLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 8,553rdMost Armed: 8,857thTop
Most Efficient Economies: 15,440thMost Scientifically Advanced: 15,892ndHighest Average Incomes: 16,152ndLargest Information Technology Sector: 16,323rdLargest Gambling Industry: 16,554thHighest Drug Use: 17,886thMost Beautiful Environments: 20,952ndMost Secular: 21,560thSmartest Citizens: 21,713thMost Inclusive: 22,373rdMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 22,551stLargest Publishing Industry: 24,165th

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