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“І АМ ЦЅІИЂ СУЯІЃЃІС ТО ЅОЏИД ЯЦЅЅІАИ”

Overview • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Democratic People's Republic of Valaken is a titanic, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Vladimir Kreplin with an iron fist, and notable for its compulsory military service, punitive income tax rates, and stringent health and safety legislation. The cynical population of 12.157 billion Valakenians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kremile. The average income tax rate is 71.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The large but stagnant Valakenian economy, worth 191 trillion Arneks a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Uranium Mining, and Pizza Delivery. Average income is 15,775 Arneks, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Valaken has designated Kremile as its capital city, Vladimir Kreplin has just been declared ruler of Valaken in an international press conference, families returning from international vacations are unable to get their children back into the country, and Vladimir Kreplin is the self-declared God of all Valaken. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Valaken's national animal is the Red Striped Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Kreplinism.

Valaken is ranked 251,431^st in the world and 1^st in East Walloria for Highest Poor Incomes, with 14,833.8 Standard Monetary Units.