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The Federation of Traffic Islands

“Slow Down And Take It Easy”

Category: Left-wing Utopia
Civil Rights:
World Benchmark
Political Freedoms:
World Benchmark

Location: The Sea Of Love

Regional Influence: Enforcer


The Federation of Traffic Islands is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Steve Winwood with a fair hand, and renowned for its frequent executions, smutty television, and strictly enforced bedtime. The hard-nosed, democratic population of 29.184 billion Traffic Islanders are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The medium-sized, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of the Fantasy Factory. The average income tax rate is 19.6%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Traffic Islandian economy, worth a remarkable 2,620 trillion United Queendom Blings a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Furniture Restoration and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 89,799 United Queendom Blings, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Sales of disinfectant wipes have skyrocketed, the richest individuals apparently buy nothing but noodles and toilet paper, most United Queendom Bling coins are riddled with bite marks, and the space program has been reduced to Steve Winwood's nephew playing with a cardboard space shuttle. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Traffic Islands's national animal is the Prairie Dog, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is the Church of the Poison Mind.

Traffic Islands is ranked 23,911th in the world and 4th in The Sea Of Love for Most Developed, scoring 79.68 on the Human Development Index.

Most Stationary: 356thLargest Publishing Industry: 467thTop
Largest Populations: 2,650thBest Weather: 3,463rdHealthiest Citizens: 3,490thMost Rebellious Youth: 3,549thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 3,947thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 4,357thMost Cultured: 4,511thMost Primitive: 5,358thHighest Economic Output: 5,851stMost Beautiful Environments: 6,292ndMost Influential: 8,292ndLongest Average Lifespans: 8,569thMost Cheerful Citizens: 9,317thSafest: 9,633rdMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 10,647thNudest: 10,829thLeast Corrupt Governments: 11,974thMost Advanced Public Education: 12,040thTop
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 12,410thHighest Disposable Incomes: 13,486thSmartest Citizens: 13,559thMost Advanced Public Transport: 14,045thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 16,622ndMost Extensive Civil Rights: 21,442ndMost Politically Free: 21,608thHighest Poor Incomes: 21,656thMost Inclusive: 22,799thMost Developed: 23,911th
Most Advanced Public Transport: 1st in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Primitive: 1st in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 1st in the region

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