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The Sleepy Little Weiler of Titisee

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Overview • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Sleepy Little Weiler of Titisee is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Jeremy Clarkson with an iron fist, and remarkable for its zero percent divorce rate, pith helmet sales, and avowedly heterosexual populace. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 38.171 billion Titiseeans are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized morass — juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Titisee City. The average income tax rate is 98.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Titiseean economy, worth a remarkable 8,514 trillion TopGears a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, extremely specialized black market in Book Publishing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. State-owned companies are the norm. Average income is an amazing 223,054 TopGears, with the richest citizens earning 6.8 times as much as the poorest.

Slackers at work are told to "crack on with it", goldfish bowls are three metres in diameter, citizens can freely debate whether Jeremy Clarkson is a great leader or the greatest leader, and any body part that can be cut off a person is no longer considered to be their property. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Titisee's national animal is the Stig, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is SuperFastCarism.

Titisee is ranked 293,175^th in the world and 3^rd in Funuzzle for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring -31.95 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.

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