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The Macanese Republic of The Shining Purple Light

“Macau é livre.”

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The Macanese Republic of The Shining Purple Light is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by President José Pereira Coutinho with an iron fist, and remarkable for its lack of airports, anti-smoking policies, and ubiquitous missile silos. The compassionate, hard-working, cynical population of 13.885 billion Macanese are proud of their wide-ranging civil freedoms, and those who aren't tend to be dragged off the streets by men in dark suits and hustled into cars with tinted windows.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt, well-organized government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Macau. The average income tax rate is 99.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Macanese economy, worth a remarkable 1,874 trillion Patacas a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is solely comprised of the Information Technology industry. Average income is an impressive 134,996 Patacas, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Immigrants who carry knives on them are presumed to be chefs, elementary school students are required to master Bach's Chaconne in D before graduation, treason is relative, and one-man canoes fitted with the latest tracking technology leave no room for one man. Crime is totally unknown. The Shining Purple Light's national animal is the Dragon, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is None.

The Shining Purple Light is ranked 7,635^th in the world and 406^th in Balder for Lowest Crime Rates, with 106.54 law-abiding acts per hour.

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