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The Ancient Magic of TCALS potion is a mammoth, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its smutty television, avowedly heterosexual populace, and ritual sacrifices. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 8.752 billion TCALS potionians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Law & Order. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 42.2%.

The frighteningly efficient TCALS potionian economy, worth a remarkable 1,295 trillion golds a year, is fairly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Tourism, and Information Technology. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 147,994 golds, with the richest citizens earning 6.3 times as much as the poorest.

Foreign musicians that Leader dislikes are turned away at the border, the saying 'break a leg' is now taken literally, the explosive fireball of the disintegrating space shuttle has devastated Cape TCALS Potion, and binoculars sales are at an all-time high. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. TCALS potion's national animal is the Elephant, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

TCALS potion is ranked 20,607^th in the world and 1^st in Cards for Most Cultured, scoring 87 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.