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The Hellish Reality of Schlueter

“Plan for the worst, hope for the best.”

Overview • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Hellish Reality of Schlueter is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Jason with an even hand, and remarkable for its daily referendums, unlimited-speed roads, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 35.995 billion Schleens enjoy some of the most opulent lifestyles in the region, unless they are unemployed or working-class, in which case they are variously starving to death or crippled by easily preventable diseases.

There is no government in the normal sense of the word; however, a small group of community-minded, corrupt, pro-business individuals is primarily concerned with Law & Order, although Industry, Public Transport, and Healthcare are also considered important, while Welfare and Environment aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tucson. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Schleen economy, worth an astonishing 10,566 trillion buttons a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Retail, Uranium Mining, and Gambling. Average income is an amazing 293,562 buttons, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,701,850 per year while the poor average 24,049, a ratio of 70.8 to 1.

Tucson has restaurants serving every meat from aardvark to zebra, mall countdown clocks warn that there are only 364 more shopping days until Maxxmas, the dartboard at the Schleen Cancer Research Charity bears a picture of Jason's face, and the government has spent days debating the merits of a petition calling for a ban on sporks. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, probably because of the absence of a police force. Schlueter's national animal is the Gila Monster, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Schlueter is ranked 914^th in the world and 50^th in Lazarus for Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector, scoring 15,449.24 on the Henry Ford Productivity Index.

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