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The Rogue Nation of Nocoins

“We don't take Visa, checks, or cash!”

Category: Psychotic Dictatorship
Civil Rights:
Unheard Of
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Unheard Of

Location: The East Pacific

Regional Influence: Sprat

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

The Rogue Nation of Nocoins is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Great Billfold with an iron fist, and renowned for its smutty television, infamous sell-swords, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 16.618 billion Cents-less Citizens are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Spirituality and Environment are also considered important, while Education and Healthcare receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of the National Mint. The average income tax rate is 51.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Nocoinsian economy, worth a remarkable 3,234 trillion liars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 194,664 liars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.9 times as much as the poorest.

Military doctrine says not to open fire until you see the "beady little eyes" of Johnny Foreigner, Loud Patriotic Music Day has been ranked the seventh best new holiday of the year, songs of praise to Great Billfold are filled with coded messages from the resistance, and graffiti artists spend lengthy periods of time in jail. Crime is all-pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Nocoins's national animal is the Dragon Turtle, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Nocoins is ranked 40,264th in the world and 731st in The East Pacific for Most Subsidized Industry, scoring 4,656.56 on the Gilded Widget Scale.

Top
1%
Most Primitive: 18thMost Ignorant Citizens: 22ndMost Devout: 49thHighest Drug Use: 155thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 159thFattest Citizens: 222ndMost Corrupt Governments: 267thMost Avoided: 325thMost Armed: 334thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 357thHighest Crime Rates: 419thBest Weather: 453rdLargest Manufacturing Sector: 512thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 517thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 907thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 997thMost Beautiful Environments: 1,091stMost Patriotic: 1,801stLargest Black Market: 1,982ndTop
5%
Most Eco-Friendly Governments: 3,653rdRudest Citizens: 4,223rdHighest Economic Output: 6,622ndMost Stationary: 7,149thHighest Disposable Incomes: 7,495thMost Authoritarian: 10,474thHighest Average Incomes: 11,124thHighest Poor Incomes: 12,965thMost Conservative: 13,359thMost Influential: 13,581stTop
10%
Largest Governments: 22,725thLargest Populations: 22,909thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 26,612th
Top
1%
Most Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Primitive: 1st in the regionHighest Drug Use: 2nd in the regionMost Devout: 2nd in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 4th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 5th in the regionMost Armed: 6th in the regionBest Weather: 6th in the regionFattest Citizens: 7th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 7th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 8th in the regionMost Avoided: 8th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 8th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 8th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 16th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 17th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 20th in the regionMost Patriotic: 23rd in the regionLargest Black Market: 30th in the regionTop
5%
Rudest Citizens: 65th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 86th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 106th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 108th in the regionMost Stationary: 112th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 165th in the regionLargest Populations: 170th in the regionTop
10%
Most Authoritarian: 253rd in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 297th in the regionMost Conservative: 317th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 398th in the regionMost Extreme: 413th in the regionLargest Governments: 440th in the region

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