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“We Are The Better Half”

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The Missing Whole of Left Butt Cheek is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Leader with a fair hand, and notable for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, rampant corporate plagiarism, and keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed, democratic population of 26.649 billion Butts enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Environment, Industry, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of a very Special Place. The average income tax rate is 95.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Left Butt economy, worth a remarkable 4,902 trillion poops a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Tourism, Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Gambling. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 183,956 poops, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

Hit TV show 'The eXecution Factor' is a critical success, the government has spent days debating the merits of a petition calling for a ban on sporks, calling out of the blue has become taboo, and teachers label difficult children as "somebody else's problem" before expelling them. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Left Butt Cheek's national animal is the Wild Diarrhoea Monster, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Left Butt Cheek is ranked 10,514^th in the world and 3^rd in Mordor for Highest Poor Incomes, with 122,332.81 Standard Monetary Units.