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“Silence the Oppressors”

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The Republic of Joseph Table is a titanic, orderly nation, ruled by Joseph Table with an iron fist, and remarkable for its parental licensing program, smutty television, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 23.671 billion Joes are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Administration, Law & Order, and Education also on the agenda, while Social Policy receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Seinovo. The average income tax rate is 60.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Joe economy, worth a remarkable 2,659 trillion Rubles a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized black market in Tourism, Book Publishing, Trout Farming, and Arms Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 112,371 Rubles, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

Mathematics majors learn about new ways to model their crushing debt, civil engineers are undermining sinkholes, the army lives rent-free in foreigners' heads and houses, and it isn't 'real music' without several cannons. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Joseph Table's national animal is the Panther, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Joseph Table is ranked 253,364^th in the world and 11^th in Soviet Union for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring -6.24 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.