Spotlight on:

The 5000 Cats of Granny Beatrice

“Who is a good little pud-pud.”

Overview • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The 5000 Cats of Granny Beatrice is a colossal, orderly nation, renowned for its flagrant waste-dumping, aversion to nipples, and zero percent divorce rate. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 7.131 billion Granny Beatriceans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Defense, and Law & Order. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 31.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Granny Beatricean economy, worth 759 trillion Chips a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Soda Sales, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is extensive. Average income is an impressive 106,439 Chips, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 307,814 per year while the poor average 29,183, a ratio of 10.5 to 1.

Children who display even minimal sporting aptitude are immediately assigned a personal trainer, job security isn't great for professional roulette players, parents are relieved they no longer need to help with their kids' algebra homework, and eerie glow-in-the-dark cornfields give farmlands an uncanny appearance. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Granny Beatrice's national animal is the Lap Cat, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Granny Beatrice is ranked 283,071^st in the world and 10^th in Bakersville for Highest Food Quality, scoring 5.37 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.

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