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The Traveling Tapir of Gio Farm 69

“Card Farming”

Overview • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Traveling Tapir of Gio Farm 69 is a colossal, orderly nation, renowned for its closed borders, strictly enforced bedtime, and daily referendums. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 9.006 billion Gio Farm 69ians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 71.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Gio Farm 69ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,306 trillion cards a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Basket Weaving. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 145,074 cards, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

Voting for pro-Bigtopian candidates is voluntary, voters who forget their name are given a hint, the new iVote app allows representatives to vote on legislation by launching ill-tempered birds and matching candies, and 13-year-old internet trolls are treated as a threat on par with terrorists. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Gio Farm 69's national animal is the farm, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Gio Farm 69 is ranked 15,119^th in the world and 14^th in Giovanniland for Most Corrupt Governments, with 121.19 kickbacks per hour.

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