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The Accidental ASS Puns of Aspen Forest

“The Fall”

Overview • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Accidental ASS Puns of Aspen Forest is a colossal, safe nation, remarkable for its avant-garde cinema, frequent executions, and daily referendums. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 6.819 billion Aspen Forestians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 84.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Aspen Forestian economy, worth 892 trillion gorillazzes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Cheese Exports, and Beef-Based Agriculture. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 130,849 gorillazzes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.0 times as much as the poorest.

A positive pregnancy test doubles as a visa, elections have become procedural nightmares due to voters persistently rejecting candidates, the overhead luggage compartment is often full, and the government mails weekly updates on the new anti-junk mail laws to every citizen. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Aspen Forest's national animal is the gorilla.

Aspen Forest is ranked 126,844^th in the world and 1,450^th in Artificial Solar System for Safest, scoring 71.09 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.

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