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The Accidental ASS Puns of Aspen Forest

“The Fall”

Overview • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Accidental ASS Puns of Aspen Forest is a massive, genial nation, remarkable for its enslaved workforce, ban on automobiles, and parental licensing program. The compassionate, humorless, devout population of 3.364 billion Aspen Forestians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 60.6%.

The powerhouse Aspen Forestian economy, worth 300 trillion gorillazzes a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Trout Farming. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 89,372 gorillazzes, with the richest citizens earning 6.6 times as much as the poorest.

The state is footing the bill for billionaires' lawyers, literally voiceless people are unable to protest when food and water are denied to them, teachers regularly paddle unruly students, and the government is denying reports that criminals injected with experimental drugs have turned into monstrous supervillains. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Aspen Forest's national animal is the gorilla, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Aspen Forest is ranked 35,930^th in the world and 354^th in Artificial Solar System for Healthiest Citizens, with 7.21 bananas ingested per day.

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