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The Kingdom of Merconitonitopia

“Fear God and Keep His Commandments”

Overview • Factbook • Dispatches • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Kingdom of Merconitonitopia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by King Montebad II with an iron fist, and notable for its avant-garde cinema, fear of technology, and complete lack of prisons. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 23.374 billion Onitonites are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Spirituality, Environment, and Healthcare also on the agenda. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bahmedag. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Onitonic economy, worth an astonishing 12,919 trillion virtues a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. State-owned companies are the norm. Average income is a breathtaking 552,718 virtues, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Frustrated teenage boys are told that if they like it then they should have put a ring on it, tax revenue is often intercepted by international accountants before ever seeing the national treasury, it is illegal to distribute Girl Guide Cookies without an advanced food hygiene diploma, and religious leaders order congregants to love any neighbour who is just like themselves. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Merconitonitopia's national animal is the dove, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Mandaeism.

Merconitonitopia is ranked 98^th in the world and 8^th in The North Pacific for Most Beautiful Environments, with 11,233.5 pounds of wildlife per square mile.

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