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The Phantasm of Afi-Aftos

“Eschew Obfuscation”

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Location: Fredonia

Regional Influence: Hegemony


The Phantasm of Afi-Aftos is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by El Guapo with an iron fist, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, free-roaming dinosaurs, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 38.112 billion Afi-Aftosians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Industry, although Administration and Healthcare are also considered important, while Social Policy and Welfare aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Dreck City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 76.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Afi-Aftosian economy, worth a remarkable 7,331 trillion Fishterous Correlations a year, is quite specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Uranium Mining, Retail, and Furniture Restoration. Average income is an impressive 192,377 Fishterous Correlations, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 625,773 per year while the poor average 44,558, a ratio of 14.0 to 1.

Whole-wheat loaves are sold under the counter in brown paper bags, piracy is the nation's most popular pastime, euthanasia is illegal, and exploding toys that leak battery acid are back in the shops after the government declared child safety 'over-rated'. Crime is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Afi-Aftos's national animal is the Vermicious Knid, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Dudeism.

Afi-Aftos is ranked 207,948th in the world and 6th in Fredonia for Lowest Crime Rates, with 3.5 Law-abiding Acts Per Hour.

Most Subsidized Industry: 3rdMost Stationary: 9thLargest Populations: 58thLargest Mining Sector: 110thMost Ignorant Citizens: 185thLargest Black Market: 207thMost Corrupt Governments: 356thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 363rdMost Primitive: 407thMost Avoided: 433rdMost Efficient Economies: 518thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 614thHighest Crime Rates: 685thFattest Citizens: 770thHighest Economic Output: 833rdHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 907thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 970thLargest Retail Industry: 1,658thRudest Citizens: 1,999thTop
Highest Wealthy Incomes: 4,795thMost Influential: 5,758thNudest: 6,180thHighest Average Incomes: 7,075thMost Advanced Public Transport: 8,606thMost Armed: 8,995thTop
Largest Governments: 10,912thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 12,061stMost Secular: 15,838thHighest Average Tax Rates: 17,685th

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