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The Phantasm of Afi-Aftos is a behemoth, efficient nation, ruled by Whoop Dee Whoop with an iron fist, and renowned for its teetotalling pirates, pith helmet sales, and sprawling nuclear power plants. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 51.519 billion Afi-Aftosians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The enormous, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Loompaland. The average income tax rate is 96.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Afi-Aftosian economy, worth an astonishing 13,989 trillion Fishterous Correlations a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Uranium Mining, Retail, Furniture Restoration, and Basket Weaving. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 271,548 Fishterous Correlations, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

Conscripts often volunteer for a second tour of duty so they can get a ticket to next year's Army Revue, visiting dignitaries often take advantage of strict reparation policies by stubbing their toes, teen boys and girls find stick-figure-aided lectures on their comradestruation emphasises socialist unity more than biology, and barber shops need government approval before introducing new hairstyles. Crime is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Afi-Aftos's national animal is the Vermicious Knid, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Dudeism.

Afi-Aftos is ranked 307,445^th in the world and 3^rd in Fredonia for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring -28.98 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.