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The Republic of Pineapple Belongs on Pizza 1

“Pineapple DOES belong on pizza!”

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The Republic of Pineapple Belongs on Pizza 1 is a colossal, orderly nation, renowned for its frequent executions, state-planned economy, and stringent health and safety legislation. The cynical population of 5.923 billion Pineapple Belongs on Pizza 1ians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Healthcare. The average income tax rate is 47.8%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but stagnant Pineapple Belongs on Pizza 1ian economy, worth 36.3 trillion rubles a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, quite specialized black market in Trout Farming, Cheese Exports, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 6,130 rubles, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The armed forces are locked in an expensive and bloody war abroad to stamp out possible terrorists, fashion magazine covers finally display realistic body images following photo-manipulation becoming illegal, citizens must have a license to operate a computer, and glittering new sports stadiums adorn every city and town. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Pineapple Belongs on Pizza 1's national animal is the tiger, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Pineapple Belongs on Pizza 1 is ranked 90,046^th in the world and 8^th in Cringe and Poggers for Safest, scoring 86.7 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.

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