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The Holy Pâtissier of Linguiniland

“Marshmallow?”

Overview • Factbook • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Holy Pâtissier of Linguiniland is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Princess Turdina with a fair hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, keen interest in outer space, and digital currency. The compassionate, democratic population of 5.523 billion Linguinilandians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mewni. The average income tax rate is 84.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Linguinilandian economy, worth 739 trillion Dragon Scaleses a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Trout Farming. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 133,816 Dragon Scaleses, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Criminals are put to death while cuddling their favourite teddy bear, rebuilding efforts for a recently destroyed cathedral aren't expected to be completed for another century, the military refers to helpless combatants offering surrender as "sitting ducks", and you're never too young to learn how to lie with confidence. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Linguiniland's national animal is the Pink Fairy Armadillo, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Aupheliaism.

Linguiniland is ranked 57,876^th in the world and 2,732^nd in the South Pacific for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 50.99 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.

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