The Bar on the corner of every regionBoard

Annihilators of chan island wrote:

It's a magic bathroom if by magic you mean never been cleaned in years.

The "not been cleaned in years" part isn't magic; it's laziness ... er, job security so no one forgets how much they need me, the humble janitor.

Puppet tyranacility wrote:

I defy death.

And basic personal hygiene too, apparently.

Lady hevoline wrote:

Its pirate talk ya buckle head

Well, there's the problem--No one here's a pirate, arr.

The weekend poetry contest has begun. PR Megaforce will be judging you.

"Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese."

I guess they write about what they please

Pretty flowers and babbling brooks

Not kitchen maids and pastry cooks

While your thoughts are roaming where they please

Do me a favour and pass the cheese

Annihilators of chan island wrote:

Oh hi Mr Grimm Reaper. How are you doing?

Are you still okay with the necromancy I've been dabbling in recently by the way?

_{HOW YOU CHOOSE TO SPEND YOUR TIME IS UP TO YOU, ALTHOUGH WHY YOU'D CHOOSE TO ROMANCE NECKS IS BEYOND ME - SOUNDS A BIT LIKE THE HABITS OF A VAMPIRE.}

Puppet tyranacility wrote:

Nah
I defy death.

_{I KNOW YOU DO, BUT YOU CANNOT DEFY ME FOREVER - I AM INEVITABLE.}

The Grimm Reaper wrote:

_{I AM INEVITABLE.}

Here, take one--you're also in need of a breath mint. On second thought, take two.

Zombie Penguins wrote:

The weekend poetry contest has begun. PR Megaforce will be judging you.

A poem from up north, as my own third place bid:
Canadian cheese
Give me third place, please
All these maple trees
They hold the keys
Eh

*Chugs a gallon of maple syrup*

Maple Hockey Canadia wrote:

*Chugs a gallon of maple syrup*

Ooo, performance art! See, that makes your submission superior and therefore worthy of Second Place instead of Third.

Annihilators of chan island wrote:

It's a magic bathroom if by magic you mean never been cleaned in years.

Oh, I never realized I owned a magic bathroom. I wonder what other magical properties it possesses..?

Ratfink wrote:

Oh, I never realized I owned a magic bathroom. I wonder what other magical properties it possesses..?

It's not really magic restroom unless one or more dark gods live there. There's only one Cthulhu, of course, but maybe you can find a dark godling at the local equivalent of a dark god puppy mill somewhere near you? Pro tip: If you adopt a dark godling when it's small, it's easier to train. Cthulhu was thousands of centuries old when he took up residence here, which probably explains why we can't break hir of the habit of spinning the toilet paper off the rolls every day.

_{What? Again? Bad, Cthulhu! Bad!}

Brocklandia wrote:

It's not really magic restroom unless one or more dark gods live there. There's only one Cthulhu, of course, but maybe you can find a dark godling at the local equivalent of a dark god puppy mill somewhere near you? Pro tip: If you adopt a dark godling when it's small, it's easier to train. Cthulhu was thousands of centuries old when he took up residence here, which probably explains why we can't break hir of the habit of spinning the toilet paper off the rolls every day.

_{What? Again? Bad, Cthulhu! Bad!}

Ah
I was wondering where the eldritch god was
_{Wait, who was the other great god of the abyss who’s dream constitutes reality?}

Brocklandia pls open embassys with GERMANIC Europe

Lady hevoline wrote:

Brocklandia pls open embassys with GERMANIC Europe

Drunkndisorderly is in charge of embassies. Which is great for me, since my persona is well-known for being too lazy to find the button, much less press it.

Puppet tyranacility wrote:

_{Wait, who was the other great god of the abyss who’s dream constitutes reality?}

Are you referring to ex, the one who could never seem to tell fantasy from reality?

Brocklandia wrote:

Drunkndisorderly is in charge of embassies. Which is great for me, since my persona is well-known for being too lazy to find the button, much less press it.

Pls so are you

Lady hevoline wrote:

Pls so are you

Having the ability to do things does not equal being in charge of the things. If we don't want to step on each others toes we keep out of each others business.

Lady hevoline wrote:

Litter

Antifa

by Lady hevoline

This Is The Infamous Antifa Policy. I am here to clear up the lies that these terrorists attempt to shove down our collective throats. Consider this the cure for their vile oozing propaganda.

Philosophy:

Voluntary protectors of democracy, equality, liberty and freedom, delivers of justice, we are Antifa and we are everywhere.

United as a diverse Anti-Fascist force, we stand in resistance to hate, tyranny, intolerance and oppression promoted by the forces of fascism. This is a lie. Protecting Democracy does not mean that you are allowed to invade a region that is opposed to you despite not following fascism! A democracy does not invade regions opposed to it's existence! A democracy also does not protect undemocratic systems like Communism, which is by definition, a totalitarian system of government in which a single authoritarian party controls state-owned means of production! The word diverse is also a lie, because their organization is a completely partisan, radical left movement made up overwhelmingly by communists and anarchists! While we are on that subject, Anarchists are not "deliverers of justice". The entire anarchist ideology is one opposed to the rule of law and supportive of vigilante mob justice!

Mission

Deny fascism a platform to spread hate, tyranny, intolerance and oppression on NationStates.

Protect innocent regions against fascist invasion and oppression.
Fascism... You use that word a lot. Do you know what true fascism is? Because Antifa would have you believe that any anticommunist, anti-anarchist ideology, fascist or otherwise, is fascism. Capitalism is not fascism. Conservatism is not fascism. Centrism is not fascism. Fascism is fascism. But to Antifa and their Terrorist allies, You are either with them, or you are literally hitler. Pretty much like this.

Membership (conditions):

Antifa is welcoming and encouraging of ANY region or nation of who wish to stand up and fight the good fight. There will be NO ideological barriers with the obvious exception of Fascists and Dictators.

However the following policies must be adhered to by voluntary member regions:

- Must not have Fascist, Totalitarian tags on their own region.

- Must not have embassies with Fascist, Totalitarian tagged regions.

- Willing to provide WA endorsement support for Anitfa operations (Liberations, invasions and defences).

- There will be no infighting when it comes to Antifa operations or regions with regard to ideological or personal differences. You cannot win a war fighting with your brothers and sisters. What you debate in your own regions/telegrams is of no concern to the collective or its mission.

- Your region sends a representative to reside in Antifa, for reportive and conversational purposes.

- Your region allows Antifa to post recruitment messages for active operations within your regions Regional Message Board. This also is full of lies. The Antifascist movement claims to be fighting the fight against fascism, but in truth, they are terrorists with a false cause. If you want to fight fascism, embrace democracy and the rule of law. If you want to defeat fascism, do not destroy and act violently. Do the right thing, and act against antifa, if you don't, then you will be trading a fascist for a fascist.

Read dispatch

Sweeps the litter off the counter to set down a beer.

Let me know when you want your second one.

Zany Zanes wrote:

Having the ability to do things does not equal being in charge of the things. If we don't want to step on each others toes we keep out of each others business.
Sweeps the litter off the counter to set down a beer.

Let me know when you want your second one.

The book isn't litter but whatever

Chugs the beer

Another one.

Lady hevoline wrote:

The book isn't litter but whatever

Chugs the beer

Another one.

If one mans trash is another mans treasure, then one mans treasure is another mans trash.

Sets down their other beer.

Zany Zanes wrote:

If one mans trash is another mans treasure, then one mans treasure is another mans trash.

Sets down their other beer.

Its true though they claim to be protectors but in true there terrorists.

Drinks it slowly this time

Sunday Lunch

A bowl of soup, it looks so yummy
Just the thing to warm your tummy

Gravy, Roast Potatoes, I remembered to buy four
Peaches and cream a dessert to die for

Now what's your latest adventure, your latest wheeze
Let's talk about it over a nice piece of CHEESE

Lady hevoline wrote:

Litter

Zany Zanes wrote:

Sweeps the litter off the counter to set down a beer.

Lady hevoline wrote:

The book isn't litter but whatever

What Zanes is trying a little too gently to say is that the Bar is a place for everyone to gather and unwind, not a place for polarizing political pontificating*. Whether from the Liberal, Conservative, or Silly Parties**, we tend to avoid contentious subjects that can create arguments***. Besides, one person's "terrorist" has this weird way of turning out to be another's "freedom fighter," and vice versa.****

Besides, remember the long-standing part in the Bar's Factbook that says "🍻 No RMB recruitment and sub-par advertisements for polls. 🥂"? This appears to be a recruitment ad.
_____

_{* Don't we all love alliteration? Footnotes?--Not so much, maybe, but you can suffer through.}

_{** Shout out to all our Python fans. They were fifty years ahead of their time, and getting ahead-er all the time.}

_{*** Remember how I said recently that we try to avoid doing things that cause the NS Moderators to take an interest in the Bar? Political "discussions" and the resulting debates have been a major source of Moderator "interest."}

_{**** Gods/angels and demons in most theologies always seem to originate as the same type of organism, differing only by interpretation.}

Zombie Penguins wrote:

The weekend poetry contest has begun. PR Megaforce will be judging you.

*Strides up onto the Bar's mini-stage with a parrot perched on his shoulder*

Arr! Another Third Place candidate for your consideration, mateys.

I’ve traveled the world,
I’ve sailed in pirate ships
I’ve seen all that’s worthy to rehash,
But still have a yearning
That’s constant and burning
For cheese and a cure for this rash.

*Steps down, looks around in shame.*

_{Uh, thanks. That will be all. You may return to your regularly scheduled drinking.}