2

DispatchAccountDrama

by The Grand Diarchy of Harmonic Empire. . 21 reads.

「 Eros's Adventure Guidebook - Chapter 1, First steps into Harmonia and the world beyond 」Neu Breslau

Neu Breslau
Location: Ostsee-managed Special Region, North Volland

Ahh, this place is quite simply wonderful~! I’ll tell you, the air here is rather fresh for some reason. Of course, I’m talking about the village where we began our journey. Miss Gertud and the others living here call it Neu Breslau, but the folks in “Ostsee GmbH”, basically the ones who run things around this village, officially call it Outpost 2. Miss Gertud said this place was an abandoned village that they repurposed into a military outpost, and it just sort of grew into a small market town. A lot of the trade between the Deochland and the Harmonisch Riche passes through here. Now I’m just wondering what kind of goods they brought here? Also, about the building design here, it resembles Aenglish architecture, though I can say these buildings look way better.

The village has been around for 2 years now. Its inhabitants are, quite literally, two worlds combined. On one hand, we have Yverde’s native Fuhsanich, Hundmenn, and Kattnius peoples; the ones that live here are mostly refugees from tribes that rebelled against Harmonia after the Velvet War. I guess they couldn’t adapt to the Imperial reformations, but eh, what do I know about politics? On the other hand, we have Men; just regular old Humans, except they’re from a different world. People like me, Succubi, as well as a lot of the other denizens of Yverde are nothing more than myths over there in their world; we are so special on their eyes~.

People that closely resemble humans are warmly welcomed here, just like the Fuhsanich woman named Alicia and her daughter Julia; they run an ice cream shop near the town square. Rumour has it that they’re even allowed to marry people from Earth. However, for the people who are, as they say, “inhuman” in appearance, like the Lacerta, or “Lizardmen” as they call them, they will be either forced to leave or outright shot. Anything strange and ugly enters this village? The poor thing would immediately get harassed by the guards in their strange green-grey outfits all day, all night, no mercy.

Oh yea, while I was writing this bit, I was in Miss Gertud's chapel. Ludvig’s asleep in his room in the back. I’ll be honest, I hate it every time the bell rings; it reminds me of those fanatic Vallanchian bastards and Theorian schmucks. But at least Miss Gertud is different. She doesn’t force people to follow her belief or insult them for their different worldview. Anyways, talking about planning here, she said she was interested to go on an adventure with me, but I’m wondering if her boss is alright with this. She keeps telling me “it’s okay!” with her curious smile. She even asked my demon friend, Martha, to run things while she’s away.

Our first plan with the group was to visit a newly built town for the Warennich tribesmen in North Volland. I heard it is a fulfilment by Casserine Ylva Brynhildr after she promised the Warennich to give them a new home, after they were driven out from their original homeland in West Sandrau by the Vallanchian bastards. Guh, I just hate those cruel fanatics! Anyways, the town is very close to Neu Breslau. Thanks to Ostsee’s map of the area, we can navigate quite easily.

Miss Gertud went to ask for paid leave at the Ostsee office in town. Meanwhile, I went to buy supplies for our journey in the Neu Breslau marketplace, which is in the town square. The town has a population of about a few hundred according to Miss Gertud, but many merchants that pass by often stop here to sell their goods. This is so exciting!


I finally got back to Miss Gertud’s chapel, and so I instantly plopped into the sofa; ahh, it’s really sooooft~. Gertud asked where I went, so I told her that I bought some spaghetti for her and Ludvig from the Silver Dew Tavern. Then I realised: “Damnit, it’s already cold!” So Gertud was like “Ara ara, it is fine, Eros, we can heat it up in the microwave!” I really don’t know how it works, but when she placed the spaghetti inside that white metallic box, pressed buttons that made beeping noises, and let it spin around for a couple of minutes, it came out nice and hot, almost like it was freshly served then and there! This is amazing stuff right here, folks. I bet it uses the some sort of machine that can cast magic to make it hot without burning it! Anyways, I watched Miss Gertud and Ludvig as they ate the spaghetti. I wonder what they think about it?

“Oh my… this is Thyra's spaghetti, right? I go to the Silver Dew Tavern often. She makes the best food!” - Gertrud Wallen

“Uooooooohh!! This is really good! B-but… I’m sure big sis can make something ten times better… right, big sis?” - Ludvig Wallen

Damnit, it’s nearly noon; Gertud and Ludvig are pretty much ready to go and here I am, writing this instead of taking a bath. Waaah, I’m still sleepy! Oh well, I’ll just take a quick bath and pack up while Gertud makes some eggs, bacon, and toast for us. Ehehe, yummy breakfast. Of course, Luvdig always enjoy his big sister’s cooking. When we were done eating, Gertud put all our baggage into the metal boxy carriage thing—it’s about size of a horse cart without the horse—while we washed the dishes. When everything was done, I hopped inside. Ludvig and I really enjoy the cold air~. I saw Martha waving her hand at me as Gertud handed the keys over to her. I just hope she doesn’t stir up some trouble, very bad issues~. Welp, our first destination is going to be a new town inhabited by some Warennich tribesmen. Let’s go!

Neu Breslau Market

Oho! This is pretty amazing! Even if it is a tad small compared to the markets in bigger cities, there are dozens of merchants coming from all over to sell their goods to the humans from Earth as well as get their hands on outworldish products like… hmm… food inside this weird metallic cylindrical thing, it writes “Canned Rye Bread with Smoked Ham”… wah, that sounds tasty. I don’t recommend opening it with your bare hands, unless of course you’re strong enough or have razor sharp claws. I had to open it with my knife, but when I tasted it, gosh it was absolutely delicious. I’m definitely gonna buy more, hehehe~.

The more I hanged around looking at stuff in the marketplace, the more I saw products that one would normally consider exotic, but in Earth, it’s actually common and pretty cheap! Rock-hard candies with different flavours, chocolate waffles, and spice powder in a jar. Hyuuuh~, this is heaven for my curiosity! One day, I swear I’ll visit their world and learn their culture!

Man, I bought quite a lot of supplies for the journey ahead. I got a bit tired, so I took a break and came to Alicia’s ice cream shop. Miss Gertud said she makes the best ice cream in the village! I ordered moonberry ice cream. Ahh~, eating ice cream now that it’s Summermonth and hot as hell is really good! Just for 1 Cepel, I got this wonderful ice cream! I absolutely recommend you try it out if you happen to visit the marketplace of Neu Breslau!

I heard a famous chef from the southern lands opened a tavern in this village. They also say that the food is rather amazing and a must try when visiting this place. If I recall correctly, its name is the Silver Dew Tavern. It’s close to the market, so I think I’ll stop by. It is fairly new but is somehow always full of customers. I'm wondering… just who is this “famous chef”?

The Silver Dew Tavern

Damn! Just as I entered the tavern, the smell of delicious food overwhelmed me! So rich and tasty! No wonder this place is always full, the aroma of food would make anyone hungry! I managed to grab an empty seat just when someone was about to sit. Anyway, a Hundmenn tavern maid came over and brought me a menu; after browsing it for a bit, I ordered today’s special which is… spaghetti? Hmmmm, a chef from the south cooking an Ygremirian dish? He must be a traveller too, I kind of want to meet him after this.

The maid finally brought the food and holy mother of Eostre! This spaghetti smells amazing! I can’t wait to try it… DELICIOUS!! It’s as if the chef put mythical enchanted Asgardian spices or magic directly into my mouth! It’s just unbelievable! It reminds me of my mother’s cooking. So I asked the tavern maid for two more servings in boxes so I can bring them back for Miss Gertud and Ludvig to have a try. I also requested to meet the chef in the kitchen in person, and after a few seconds, she came back and said yes. She says anyone can meet him as long they don’t delve into sensitive topics. Ohoho, I just can’t miss this opportunity!

I can’t bloody believe it! The “famous chef” who owns the Silver Dew is none other than Thyra Yrvaede! In case you need a refresher, she was a general in Caserine Gunhild’s army, and also the mother of Caserine Ylva Brynhildr. I would’ve never guessed that she’d be the one cooking this delicious food! Fuwaa~, she’s kind and gentle, definitely the apple of everyone’s eyes here in the village. Although, unfortunately for any potential suitors, she’s apparently already dating someone! She told me that he’s an Ostsee bigshot, a big warning sign for anyone still trying to vie for her hand; anyone trying something funny is practically asking for a beatdown by the strange green-grey men. She then showed me her godly cooking skills, something in the lines of needing several centuries of training to master. But she told me:

“Anyone can cook something good if they put their hearts into it! You don’t need to master the art of cookery for decades upon decades, you just need the right ingredients and temperature, and of course you need to have a taste for every dish. I, myself, learned from all over! Even Caserine Gunhild and my first husband taught me things I didn’t know beforehand.”

I asked about her first husband, but she didn’t want to answer it. That’s one “sensitive topic”, I guess. And then I asked about the man she’s dating. She said that she loves him very much, and that he’s very kind and supportive. He has been helping her with many things lately. He was actually the one who suggested that she open the Silver Dew. She also mentioned that he helped defend her village, which is supposedly a peaceful home in the southern jungle where she spent the last few years in retirement, against a giant beast that appeared out of nowhere! When she proposed to him, he accepted, and now they’re together! I’m imagining he’s a big muscular man with a big heart. Fufufu~, sounds like a very lovey dovey couple.

While Miss Thyra was baking some pies for the hungry customers, I noticed something; the kitchen and dining hall are really clean. The tavern maids did nice job at tidying up the dining hall and Thyra really knows how to keep her kitchen clean! Damn, the synergy at play here reminds me of the higher succubi; we always clean it thoroughly, if you know what I mean! Hahahaha! Anyway, I was wondering where her first daughter, Bergljot, was and why she wasn’t here with her mother’s business, so Thyra said that she prefers working as a monster hunter, and is busy training herself so that when she meets Ylva again, she can beat her in a duel. Just how absurdly strong are Caserine Ylva and her sister? Kids these days.

Lastly, I asked her if it was possible to meet her new boyfriend. She said it would’ve been fine, but unfortunately he’s quite busy over in Earth. She said he was working on an advanced automaton or something like that. Cool, huh? I once read a book about an ancient civilization, the Vril, who harnessed the power of automatons to build an underground empire and escape the wars that once engulfed the surface in holy fire… twice. It must be wonderful for the outworlders if they could utilize them too. And just before I left, I bought one of Thyra’s pies! Walking around the village while sightseeing with her pies to snack on… the feeling is just indescribable!

The Warthog Thunderbolt

I found this unique building with a flashy and bright sign of a pig wearing raider goggles and riding a bolt of lightning. It says “The Warthog Thunderbolt” and “open 24/7 except when we’re not”. Hm, very interesting. So I opened the glass door and went inside, and it looks like a regular old pub, I guess? But the room design, I’ve never seen anything quite like this. Strange. The room lighting feels different to what I’m used to, though I noticed it’s consistent across all buildings in this village; they aren’t using candles or lanterns, and instead have flashy glowing glass tubes or something like that. It kind of looks similar to Magic-powered lights. And the folks here are enjoying the drinks made by a Human-Daemon bartender girl. I think I might just try one.

So, well, I asked for the bartender’s recommendation and ordered that. Oh gosh, her drink mixing skills are so awesome! The way she threw bottles into the air and poured stuff into the thing and shook the whole thing and poured it into a glass and slid it over to me after throwing some decorations into it! Fuwaa! Those were some smooth moves; truly an amazing talent. Right as she gave me the drink, she smiled and said the cocktail’s name—“Lucky Touch”. I asked what it meant, and, well, since my publishers won’t let me write down content that isn’t very “family friendly”, I’m sorry to say that you’ll have to find that out for yourself; not that that’s a bad thing, this place is remarkable! Anyway, I’ll tell you, the drink is so damned sweet, smooth, and refreshing, with a bit of that kick at the end. To say I liked it would be an insult, I absolutely loved it! Maybe she knew what type of drink I preferred? Somehow, my senses keep telling me that she was somehow reading my mind. Well, it ended up with a good drink so I’ll let it pass. Also, the flavour kind of reminds me of Susserian. If you don’t know what that is, it’s a prized fruit from Muspelheim that’s usually used for… ugh… more family unfriendly content here, sorry guys.

So, as I was enjoying my drink a brawl erupted around 4 chairs away from me. As I saw it, a drunk Fuhsanich guy literally smashed a glass bottle into the head of the Human next to him, and the fight just sort of blew up from there. The Fuhsanich’s and Human’s friends joined in, while the other patrons either tried to stop the fight or just went about their day. The bartender girl was about to pull out her shotgun to hopefully calm things down when that Fuhsanich guy accidentally threw a bottle at the Warrenich woman next to me. Thank goodness it wasn’t me! But, well, she stood up and emitted an ominous and dreadful aura around her. I looked at her again, and oh sh-t, I just realised she was wearing a uniform with the insignia of the Harmonisch Riche's Death Korps; basically one of Caserine Ylva’s most elite and loyal military units. I have no idea what she’s doing here in a small village like this, but I really think I should leave.

Thankfully, the situation was quickly defused when the strange green/grey guards came in and arrested everyone participating in the fight. Before they left, they reminded everyone to try and not cause a ruckus like this in the future. Well, crisis averted, but I can only shudder when I speculate about what would’ve happened if that Warrenich woman went nuts and f-cked sh-t up. In quick order, I paid my bill and left. Despite the little hiccup, I still will definitely come back again! I recommend this place for any travellers stopping by; the drinks are great, the atmosphere is great, and if you’re lucky and come in when the Human-Daemon bartender girl is on shift, she’ll whip up a drink that’ll cure all your life’s problems in a heartbeat!

RawReport