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The Very Volatile Vampire of Valtarre

“I'm the monsters they become”

Overview • Dispatches • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Very Volatile Vampire of Valtarre is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by The Vampire King with an iron fist, and remarkable for its parental licensing program, public floggings, and complete lack of public education. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 20.48 billion victims are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Spirituality, Environment, and Industry are also considered important, while Education receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Hideout. The average income tax rate is 66.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The large but underdeveloped malicious economy, worth 446 trillion blood drops a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, highly specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Retail, and Cheese Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 21,801 blood drops, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The only way to escape lengthy prison terms is in a body bag, many victims struggle to find outlets for their pent-up competitive juices, women who are caught shoplifting are sent home to their fathers with a patronising pat on the bottom, and children as young as twelve are conscripted into the armed forces. Crime, especially youth-related, is almost non-existent, thanks to a well-funded police force. Valtarre's national animal is the target, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Valtarre is ranked 76,131^st in the world and 78^th in The Brotherhood of Malice for Most Advanced Defense Forces, scoring 3,487.38 on the Total War Preparedness Rating.

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