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The Military Dictatorship of Tzuland

“Ignorance is Bliss”

Overview • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Military Dictatorship of Tzuland is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by General Tzu with an iron fist, and remarkable for its state-planned economy, aversion to nipples, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 17.829 billion Tzulandians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Fort Tzuland. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Tzulandian economy, worth an astonishing 20,065 trillion Golds a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 1,125,445 Golds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.0 times as much as the poorest.

The police crack down on tax evaders without mercy, crowded passenger trains are near-silent save for the soft tap of fingers on touchscreens, dangerous criminals are often 'accidentally' sent on one-way trips to Maxtopia, and policemen want to put the nation's homosexuals up against a wall. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tzuland's national animal is the Golden Pig, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Tzuism.

Tzuland is ranked 3,067^th in the world and 11^th in Yggdrasil for Fattest Citizens, with 31.06 Obesity Rate.

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