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The Vala Ainur of Tulkas Champion of the Valar |
“Tulkas, whose anger passes like a mighty wind”
Category: Psychotic Dictatorship | ||
Civil Rights: Unheard Of |
Economy: All-Consuming |
Political Freedoms: Few |
Location: Valinor |
Regional Influence: Diplomat |
The Vala Ainur of Tulkas Champion of the Valar is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Will of Eru with an iron fist, and notable for its restrictive gun laws, suspicion of poets, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, cynical, devout population of 3.126 billion Tulkas are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."
The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Melamar. The average income tax rate is 68.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.
The all-consuming Tulkas economy, worth 302 trillion Light of the Valars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Automobile Manufacturing, and Cheese Exports. Average income is 96,681 Light of the Valars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.
Stony-faced prosecutors play loud gangster rap music during court proceedings, ten-year-olds regularly found their own political parties, TCOTV-SPAN viewership drops as MPs act their age, and flight attendants rip down curtains with revolutionary fervor. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tulkas Champion of the Valar's national animal is the Secret Fire, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Faith of Eru.
Tulkas Champion of the Valar is ranked 30,622nd in the world and 3rd in Valinor for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring 5,168.09 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- : Following new legislation in
Tulkas Champion of the Valar, flight attendants rip down curtains with revolutionary fervor.
- : Following new legislation in
Tulkas Champion of the Valar, TCOTV-SPAN viewership drops as MPs act their age.
- : Following new legislation in
Tulkas Champion of the Valar, ten-year-olds regularly found their own political parties.
- : Following new legislation in
Tulkas Champion of the Valar, stony-faced prosecutors play loud gangster rap music during court proceedings.
- : Following new legislation in
Tulkas Champion of the Valar, the nation's soldiers are considered the best-dressed in Valinor.
- :
Tulkas Champion of the Valar was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Lowest Crime Rates.
- :
Tulkas Champion of the Valar was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Healthiest Citizens and Most Compassionate Citizens and the Top 10% for Best Weather.
- : Following new legislation in
Tulkas Champion of the Valar, it turns out you can teach cats new tricks.
- : Following new legislation in
Tulkas Champion of the Valar, citizens simply have to point a weapon at a government official to get what they want.
- : Following new legislation in
Tulkas Champion of the Valar, it is illegal to distribute Girl Guide Cookies without an advanced food hygiene diploma.