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The Free and Holy Republic of The Happy Civilians

“Perfectly Fine, Thank You....”

Category: Corporate Police State
Civil Rights:
Unheard Of
Political Freedoms:

Location: The East Pacific

Regional Influence: Sprat


The Free and Holy Republic of The Happy Civilians is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by the Brilliant Leader with an iron fist, and remarkable for its teetotalling pirates, avowedly heterosexual populace, and parental licensing program. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 17.996 billion Patriotic Citizens are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The minute, corrupt, moralistic, pro-business, well-organized government, or what there is of one, prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order is also considered important, while Environment and Welfare are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Joyous City of Freedom. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Patriotic Citizen economy, worth a remarkable 8,317 trillion Almighty Dollars a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is an amazing 462,210 Almighty Dollars, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,354,455 per year while the poor average 50,079, a ratio of 47.0 to 1.

A paperwork error has naval privateers being directed to attack land-locked nations, self-driving cars occasionally mow down pedestrians to avoid inconveniencing passengers, new "Worker's Strike" laws set out who is allowed to strike a worker, and employers may fire workers without giving any reason. Crime is pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. The Happy Civilians's national animal is the Super Amazing Brave Eagle, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Christianity.

The Happy Civilians is ranked 138,726th in the world and 4,853rd in The East Pacific for Most Extensive Civil Rights, with 17.79 Martin Luther King, Jr. Units.

Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 17thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 21stLargest Insurance Industry: 44thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 50thFattest Citizens: 51stMost Avoided: 68thMost Devout: 70thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 71stLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 86thMost Ignorant Citizens: 93rdMost Corrupt Governments: 96thHighest Disposable Incomes: 137thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 144thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 151stLargest Retail Industry: 155thLargest Mining Sector: 194thMost Armed: 288thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 293rdHighest Average Incomes: 326thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 341stLargest Cheese Export Sector: 473rdLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 514thHighest Economic Output: 520thRudest Citizens: 621stLargest Agricultural Sector: 780thMost Primitive: 800thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1,122ndMost Stationary: 1,410thTop
Most Efficient Economies: 1,742ndLargest Gambling Industry: 1,952ndHighest Crime Rates: 2,002ndLargest Black Market: 5,955thLargest Populations: 6,349thTop
Greatest Rich-Poor Divides: 8,304thMost Influential: 9,478thMost Pro-Market: 11,153rdMost Conservative: 12,297th
Fattest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Avoided: 1st in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 1st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1st in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1st in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2nd in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 2nd in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 3rd in the regionMost Devout: 3rd in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 3rd in the regionMost Armed: 3rd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 4th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 4th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 4th in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 5th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 8th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 10th in the regionRudest Citizens: 10th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 11th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 15th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 15th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 22nd in the regionMost Primitive: 22nd in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 32nd in the regionMost Stationary: 32nd in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 32nd in the regionLargest Populations: 53rd in the regionTop
Largest Black Market: 107th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 144th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 202nd in the regionTop
Most Influential: 542nd in the region

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