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“Battania go Bragh”

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The Ard-Ríocht of The Foraois is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by High King Áed III of House Uí Néit with an iron fist, and notable for its parental licensing program, ritual sacrifices, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 7.932 billion Battanians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Corcaigh. The average income tax rate is 84.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Battanic economy, worth a remarkable 1,210 trillion Battanic Pounds a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, fairly diversified black market in Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 152,574 Battanic Pounds, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Sex changes are routinely performed at The Foraois's hospitals, the latest guided missile cruiser "Ship-1642" has received precisely zero column inches in the press, employers are gradually adapting to the alien premise of paying wages to their workers, and neighbourhood gossips whip up controversy about those receiving adult merchandise. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Foraois's national animal is the Boar, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Páganachas.

The Foraois is ranked 171,687^th in the world and 2,740^th in The East Pacific for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry, scoring 1,184.17 on the Spitz-Pollish Productivity Index.