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“dook dook”

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The Free Land of The Ferret Lands is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by High Chief Ferret with an iron fist, and notable for its hatred of cheese, devotion to social welfare, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, cynical, cheerful, devout population of 15.213 billion Ferrets are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The large, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ciri City. The average income tax rate is 99.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Ferret economy, worth a remarkable 3,735 trillion Cacaos a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 245,537 Cacaos, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The nation's forests are full of treasure hunters in military-grade survival gear, ministers are now allowed to put suggestions in the governmental suggestion box, government-run screening operations remove embryos with severe genetic disorders, and TV coverage of music festivals consists mostly of backstage interviews. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Ferret Lands's national animal is the Ferret, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Blackfoot.

The Ferret Lands is ranked 330,323^rd in the world and 3,517^th in the Pacific for Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry, scoring -29.8 on the Tasmanian Pulp Environmental Export Index.