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The Serene Newman Empire of The Eternal Mailmen

“Goodbye, Jerry... *gunshot*”

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The Serene Newman Empire of The Eternal Mailmen is a massive, safe nation, ruled by The Great and Powerful Newman with an iron fist, and renowned for its compulsory military service, absence of drug laws, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, cynical population of 1.958 billion Mailmen are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The medium-sized, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Welfare, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of USPS Headquarters. The average income tax rate is 36.1%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but inefficient Mailman economy, worth 73.8 trillion Stamps a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Automobile Manufacturing, and Furniture Restoration. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 37,699 Stamps, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.6 times as much as the poorest.

Helping grandma with her Misgendering 101 homework is a national rite of passage, The Eternal Mailmen has designated USPS Headquarters as its capital city, The Great and Powerful Newman has been self-declared as the Most Supreme Magnificent Overlord of Everything You Ever Saw, and troublemakers boast about how many times they have to visit their therapist. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Eternal Mailmen's national animal is the Letter, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

The Eternal Mailmen is ranked 212,195^th in the world and 2^nd in Postman Lands of Messaging and sending for Most Pacifist, with 43.75 cheeks turned per day.

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