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“You Can't Stop Progress”

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The Jingoistic States of Slavic Lurkers is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Gulag Boi with an even hand, and notable for its rum-swilling pirates, punitive income tax rates, and labour-free parental leave. The compassionate, cheerful population of 9.898 billion Slavic Lurkersians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Gulag Center. The average income tax rate is 66.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Slavic Lurkersian economy, worth a remarkable 1,883 trillion Gulag Points a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 190,305 Gulag Points, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government is hoping that medical aid will speak louder than human rights abuses, it is common to see Maxémon Trainer listed on Slavic Lurkersian resumés, roads are often attended by round-the-clock construction crews, and burning twigs to keep warm while lost in the wild is now a felony. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Slavic Lurkers's national animal is the Dust Bunny, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Slavic Lurkers is ranked 321,566^th in the world and 267^th in Conch Kingdom for Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector, scoring -12.65 on the Henry Ford Productivity Index.