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The Little Caesarate of Pizzaburg

“Si tibi triginta minutis non traditur, est gratuita”

Category: Compulsory Consumerist State
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Location: Pizza Confederation

Regional Influence: Hermit


The Little Caesarate of Pizzaburg is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Emperor Charles Entertainment Cheese with an iron fist, and remarkable for its feral children, triple-decker prams, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 2.325 billion Pizzabourgeoisie are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, is effectively ruled by the Department of Industry, although Public Transport and Law & Order are also considered important, while Environment and Administration aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Pineapple-and-Hamburg. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 4.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Pizzaburguesque economy, worth 245 trillion slices a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is dominated by the Pizza Delivery industry, with significant contributions from Gambling, Soda Sales, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Average income is an impressive 105,717 slices, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 791,104 per year while the poor average 4,102, a ratio of 192 to 1.

Kids feel more beat up than ever after a hard day at school, unemployment rates have skyrocketed as businesses abandon the country in search of cheap labour, pre-schoolers who draw stick figures of their favorite celebrities are sued for infringing image rights, and the Pizzaburg Automotive Racing Series draws millions of spectators annually while those near the tracks complain about the noise. Crime is pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Pizzaburg's national animal is the anchovy, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Church of Jesus Crust of Latter-Day Sauce.

Pizzaburg is ranked 163,974th in the world and 1st in Pizza Confederation for Largest Governments, scoring 9.59 on the Bureaucratic Comprehensiveness Rating Scale Index.

Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 4thFattest Citizens: 578thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 620thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 1,191stMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1,406thMost Ignorant Citizens: 1,954thLargest Insurance Industry: 2,036thHighest Crime Rates: 2,079thTop
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 2,480thLargest Gambling Industry: 2,534thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2,922ndMost Avoided: 3,269thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 3,416thMost Primitive: 5,077thHighest Disposable Incomes: 6,103rdTop
Most Corrupt Governments: 13,559thMost Efficient Economies: 16,962ndMost Secular: 17,271stMost Subsidized Industry: 22,842nd

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