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“Wouldst thou like to live deliciously?”

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The Emeritus Augustus Pacificus of Pierconium is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Ivan Moldavi with an iron fist, and remarkable for its closed borders, anti-smoking policies, and avowedly heterosexual populace. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 36.366 billion Pacificans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, well-organized government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Defense, Healthcare, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Stromholde. The average income tax rate is 92.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Pierconiumian economy, worth a remarkable 2,996 trillion Denarii a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity. The industrial sector is solely comprised of the Arms Manufacturing industry. Average income is 82,387 Denarii, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Pierconium's free colleges struggle to maintain standards in the face of overwhelming demand, 'Police Academy 36' and 'Sharknados On A Plane' are vying for top spot at the box-office, the government is a law unto itself, and the military patrols the streets in search of possible secessionists. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Pierconium's national animal is the Drachul, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Moldavism.

Pierconium is ranked 314,074^th in the world and 3,535^th in the Pacific for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry, scoring -13.93 on the Spitz-Pollish Productivity Index.