Spotlight on:

The Democratic Republic of Patolia

“For Nation, For Party”

Overview • Map • Factbook • Dispatches • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Nuke Control • Cards

The Democratic Republic of Patolia is a massive, genial nation, ruled by Otsavin Sfarszantac with an iron fist, and remarkable for its parental licensing program, pith helmet sales, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The compassionate, hard-working, cynical population of 1.566 billion Patolians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Education, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tonstin. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 46.5%.

The strong Patolian economy, worth 96.4 trillion dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Woodchip Exports industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Arms Manufacturing, and Retail. Average income is 61,564 dollars, with the richest citizens earning 6.6 times as much as the poorest.

The dwindling faithful in the nation make expensive pilgrimages to the remaining places of worship, viewers get headaches from trying to read the screen full of small print warnings that precede most TV shows, mining safety laws are often more expensive than what's being mined, and children are often punished for the sins of the fathers. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Patolia's national animal is the hawk, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

Patolia is ranked 34,598^th in the world and 28^th in Conch Kingdom for Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry, scoring 5,615.86 on the Tasmanian Pulp Environmental Export Index.

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