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The Protectorate of Paffnicard 9

“Agricultura pro illis qui agriculturam requirunt”

Category: Father Knows Best State
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Location: 10KI Card Farm

Regional Influence: Duckspeaker


The Protectorate of Paffnicard 9 is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Aleksandar Vekili with an iron fist, and remarkable for its free-roaming dinosaurs, parental licensing program, and avowedly heterosexual populace. The compassionate, cynical, humorless, devout population of 4.154 billion Paffniacs are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Skoptopolis. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 67.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Paffniac economy, worth 544 trillion banks a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Trout Farming, and Tourism. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 130,986 banks, with the richest citizens earning 8.0 times as much as the poorest.

The new one bank coin also makes a handy throwing-star, the price of takeaway food quadruples after 6pm, the roads are notorious throughout the region for their peril, and the urinary fragrance of seedier establishments is thankfully hidden by the smell of stale smoke. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Paffnicard 9's national animal is the card, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is card farming.

Paffnicard 9 is ranked 16,187th in the world and 6th in 10KI Card Farm for Healthiest Citizens, with 11.58 bananas ingested per day.

Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 7,766thMost Patriotic: 8,309thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 12,769thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 12,819thTop
Largest Manufacturing Sector: 13,178thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 14,948thMost Devout: 15,343rdMost Developed: 15,681stLowest Crime Rates: 15,739thHealthiest Citizens: 16,187thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 16,257thMost Efficient Economies: 18,076thMost Corrupt Governments: 18,223rdLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 19,392ndLargest Black Market: 19,901stLongest Average Lifespans: 19,920thMost Subsidized Industry: 20,230thHighest Average Incomes: 21,358thLargest Governments: 21,839thLargest Agricultural Sector: 22,613thMost Scientifically Advanced: 24,425thBest Weather: 25,564th
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 1st in the regionLargest Governments: 1st in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 2nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 2nd in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 2nd in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 3rd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 3rd in the regionTop
Most Developed: 4th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 4th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 4th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 5th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 5th in the regionMost Patriotic: 5th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 6th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 6th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 6th in the regionLargest Populations: 6th in the region

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