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The Protectorate of Paffnicard 3

“Agricultura pro illis qui agriculturam requirunt”

Category: Psychotic Dictatorship
Civil Rights:
Unheard Of
Political Freedoms:

Location: 10KI Card Farm

Regional Influence: Duckspeaker


The Protectorate of Paffnicard 3 is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Aleksandar Vekili with an iron fist, and remarkable for its disturbing lack of elderly people, ubiquitous missile silos, and compulsory gun ownership. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 4.169 billion Paffniacs are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Skoptopolis. The average income tax rate is 66.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Paffniac economy, worth 533 trillion banks a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, fairly diversified black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 127,985 banks, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

Many suspect that the 'Whinny The Plop' children's magazine contains covert criticism of Aleksandar Vekili, it is illegal to make racist remarks in public, elected officials who disagree with Aleksandar Vekili have a lot of accidents, and the standardised national curriculum requires that all-male classes be taught why they have periods. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Paffnicard 3's national animal is the card, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is card farming.

Paffnicard 3 is ranked 12,984th in the world and 1st in 10KI Card Farm for Healthiest Citizens, with 13.01 bananas ingested per day.

Most Valuable International Artwork: 1,019thTop
Most Patriotic: 6,046thMost Armed: 9,303rdMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 10,176thMost Devout: 10,893rdHealthiest Citizens: 12,984thTop
Most Conservative: 13,434thLowest Crime Rates: 14,358thMost Authoritarian: 14,870thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 15,064thHighest Poor Incomes: 15,535thMost Corrupt Governments: 15,537thLargest Black Market: 15,598thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 16,373rdLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 16,639thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 17,414thMost Scientifically Advanced: 19,249thLargest Information Technology Sector: 19,693rdHighest Average Incomes: 22,541stMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 22,745thLargest Mining Sector: 23,634thLargest Governments: 26,034th
Most Conservative: 1st in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Authoritarian: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1st in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 1st in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 1st in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 2nd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 2nd in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 2nd in the regionMost Extreme: 3rd in the regionMost Devout: 3rd in the regionMost Stationary: 3rd in the regionMost Patriotic: 3rd in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 3rd in the regionTop
Largest Governments: 4th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 4th in the regionMost Influential: 4th in the regionLargest Black Market: 4th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 5th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 5th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 5th in the regionLargest Populations: 5th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 6th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 6th in the region

National Happenings

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