Spotlight on:

The Principality of Northie

“North of the North Pacific”

Overview • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Principality of Northie is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Northerner with an even hand, and remarkable for its teetotalling pirates, unlimited-speed roads, and compulsory gun ownership. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 19.753 billion Northies are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of North. The average income tax rate is 94.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Northiean economy, worth a remarkable 5,416 trillion Northerners a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, quite specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Retail, Uranium Mining, and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 274,204 Northerners, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.4 times as much as the poorest.

A government program is underway to revitalize Northie's beaches, people who have never eaten chicken are told it tastes a bit like crocodile, asthmatics can now suffer the effects of polluting chimneys from further away than ever before, and the volume of paperwork used to complete a single environmental assessment defeats the purpose. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Northie's national animal is the Northman, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Northern Runes.

Northie is ranked 319,767^th in the world and 5,571^st in The North Pacific for Most Cultured, scoring 50 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.

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