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The Communist Empire of New Schaloubade

“now ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ: Gangsta Rap(Feat: Ryan Whore Ran)👁🫦👁”

Category: Capitalist Paradise
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Location: 2nd Foolian Empire

Regional Influence: Dominator


The Communist Empire of New Schaloubade is a huge, efficient nation, notable for its deadly medical pandemics, unlimited-speed roads, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 808 million Sas are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The tiny, corrupt, pro-business government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Lawrencia. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 4.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Sassy economy, worth 105 trillion Yen a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Soda Sales, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an impressive 130,950 Yen, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 997,789 per year while the poor average 4,734, a ratio of 210 to 1.

Savvy nightclub-goers know that structurally unsound venues sell the cheapest drinks, cities in New Schaloubade declare independence based on interpretation of the historic meaning of cave paintings, airplanes have giant grilles on their noses to knock drones out of their path, and warfare increasingly resembles a video game. Crime, especially youth-related, is pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. New Schaloubade's national animal is the 猫の女の子ライアン, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

New Schaloubade is ranked 74,789th in the world and 2nd in 2nd Foolian Empire for Smartest Citizens, with 36.64 quips per hour.

Greatest Rich-Poor Divides: 1,180thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1,830thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2,119thHighest Crime Rates: 2,138thTop
Largest Retail Industry: 2,719thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 2,836thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 2,849thFattest Citizens: 2,885thMost Avoided: 3,337thRudest Citizens: 3,534thHighest Disposable Incomes: 3,922ndLargest Mining Sector: 4,707thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 8,020thLargest Gambling Industry: 8,216thMost Rebellious Youth: 8,966thMost Armed: 11,534thTop
Most Corrupt Governments: 17,293rdMost Secular: 19,728thMost Efficient Economies: 20,731stHighest Average Incomes: 21,367thMost Valuable International Artwork: 22,109thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 22,578thLargest Information Technology Sector: 23,603rd

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Endorsements Received: None.