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The Dystopian Future of MinnesotanWasteland

“You Can't Legislate Against Stupidity”

Category: Libertarian Police State
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Location: Land of Prosperity

Regional Influence: Hermit


The Dystopian Future of MinnesotanWasteland is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Jesse The Body Ventura with an iron fist, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, state-planned economy, and conspicuous electricity pylons. The compassionate, cynical, cheerful, devout population of 9.43 billion Minnesotans are proud of their wide-ranging civil freedoms, and those who aren't tend to be dragged off the streets by men in dark suits and hustled into cars with tinted windows.

The relatively small, corrupt, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Minneapolis. The average income tax rate is 64.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Wastelandian economy, worth a remarkable 4,836 trillion Pesos a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched black market in Tourism, Information Technology, Gambling, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 512,843 Pesos, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Couples are discouraged from marrying until they can rank their partner on a scale of one to ten, Jesse The Body Ventura's new door-knocking campaign has the sweet taste of success, access to the woods is only granted to those who bring a small shrubbery, and citizens know never to accept cookies from strangers. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. MinnesotanWasteland's national animal is the Swordfish, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Nudism.

MinnesotanWasteland is ranked 626th in the world and 1st in Land of Prosperity for Largest Publishing Industry, scoring 41,210.34 on the Bella Potter Productivity e-Index.

Largest Gambling Industry: 55thHighest Crime Rates: 98thHighest Poor Incomes: 125thMost Armed: 128thLargest Retail Industry: 167thMost Rebellious Youth: 278thHighest Average Incomes: 288thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 433rdMost Inclusive: 475thLargest Black Market: 498thRudest Citizens: 582ndLargest Publishing Industry: 626thMost Cultured: 636thLargest Information Technology Sector: 646thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 657thMost Efficient Economies: 694thMost Cheerful Citizens: 770thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 815thMost Corrupt Governments: 828thMost Devout: 952ndNicest Citizens: 1,069thMost Compassionate Citizens: 1,298thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1,562ndLargest Cheese Export Sector: 1,846thHighest Drug Use: 1,938thFattest Citizens: 1,944thMost Subsidized Industry: 1,986thHighest Disposable Incomes: 1,989thMost Scientifically Advanced: 2,017thHighest Economic Output: 2,167thTop
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2,540thLargest Governments: 3,057thLargest Welfare Programs: 3,616thMost Valuable International Artwork: 3,796thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 3,925thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 4,141stSmartest Citizens: 4,205thMost Advanced Public Transport: 5,099thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 6,215thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 6,693rdNudest: 6,942ndMost Beautiful Environments: 7,187thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 7,976thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 8,814thMost Advanced Public Education: 9,235thTop
Most Popular Tourist Destinations: 13,085thMost Extensive Civil Rights: 16,879thLargest Agricultural Sector: 18,245thMost Stationary: 20,637thMost Influential: 21,042nd

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Endorsements Received: None.