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The United States of Midlands

“Don't just do something - stand there”

Overview • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The United States of Midlands is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Leader with a fair hand, and renowned for its daily referendums, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 38.353 billion Midlandsians live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The minute, corrupt, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government, or what there is of one, prioritizes Industry, with Defense, Law & Order, and Education also on the agenda, while Environment and Social Policy aren't funded at all. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Midlandsian economy, worth an astonishing 28,074 trillion sand dollars a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Automobile Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Retail, Book Publishing, and Uranium Mining. Average income is a breathtaking 732,012 sand dollars, with the richest citizens earning 5.1 times as much as the poorest.

Cassocked priests and choirboys believe that what happens behind closed doors stays behind closed doors, the nation was recently voted "most likely to betray its allies", any body part that can be cut off a person is no longer considered to be their property, and cosmopolitan citizens ask what their countries can do for them. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Midlands's national animal is the bear, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Midlands is ranked 8,898^th in the world and 19^th in Capitalist Paradise for Lowest Crime Rates, with 95.56 Law-abiding Acts Per Hour.

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