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The United States of Midlands

“Don't just do something - stand there”

Overview • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The United States of Midlands is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Leader with a fair hand, and remarkable for its smutty television, national health service, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 38.804 billion Midlandsians live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The minute, corrupt, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government, or what there is of one, prioritizes Industry, although Defense, Law & Order, and Education are also considered important, while Environment and Social Policy aren't funded at all. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Midlandsian economy, worth an astonishing 28,684 trillion sand dollars a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Automobile Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Retail, Book Publishing, and Uranium Mining. Average income is a breathtaking 739,206 sand dollars, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,707,275 per year while the poor average 143,019, a ratio of 18.9 to 1.

Government ministers are regularly seen in the streets confessing their sins and hammering missiles into plow-shares, employers may fire workers without giving any reason, citizens recently voted in favour of declaring bubblewrap an 'abomination of nature', and towns are often run by puppets. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Midlands's national animal is the bear, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Midlands is ranked 219,212^th in the world and 337^th in Capitalist Paradise for Most Popular Tourist Destinations, with 1.76 Tourists Per Hour.

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