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The Richly Blended Peoples of Koffee

“Guns, Germs, Steel, and really smooth Mochas!”

Category: Capitalist Paradise
Civil Rights:
Average
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Average

Location: Wysteria

Regional Influence: Vassal

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The Richly Blended Peoples of Koffee is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Generalissimo Barista Espresso with an even hand, and notable for its deadly medical pandemics, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 48.266 billion Richly Blended Peopleses are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, is solely concerned with Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Full City. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Koffeean economy, worth an astonishing 42,464 trillion Cuppas a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Automobile Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Book Publishing. Average income is a breathtaking 879,794 Cuppas, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 8,241,938 per year while the poor average 7,897, a ratio of 1,043 to 1.

Diners regard burgers made from mechanically reclaimed cow protein as "proper meat", the Great Pyramid of Full City can be seen from miles away, Generalissimo Barista Espresso's media campaigns take a hiatus around exam week, and Brancaland has gifted over nine thousand putrid moose carcasses to Koffee as a reminder of their "special relationship". Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, probably because of the absence of a police force. Koffee's national animal is the Schrodingers Cat, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Koffee is ranked 346,238th in the world and 53rd in Wysteria for Nicest Citizens, with 0.04 average smiles per day.

Top
1%
Lowest Overall Tax Burden: 2ndHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 4thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 4thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 5thHighest Disposable Incomes: 9thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 9thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 10thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 10thLargest Populations: 14thHighest Economic Output: 14thLargest Insurance Industry: 15thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 20thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 21stLargest Soda Pop Sector: 26thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 30thHighest Average Incomes: 38thLargest Mining Sector: 41stLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 42ndLargest Gambling Industry: 50thMost Avoided: 58thSmartest Citizens: 62ndMost Scientifically Advanced: 68thLargest Agricultural Sector: 68thFattest Citizens: 70thMost Armed: 91stLargest Publishing Industry: 94thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 105thHighest Crime Rates: 141stLargest Manufacturing Sector: 195thRudest Citizens: 230thMost Cultured: 254thMost Secular: 311thMost Rebellious Youth: 720thLargest Retail Industry: 784thLargest Information Technology Sector: 1,150thMost Corrupt Governments: 1,515thMost Efficient Economies: 1,932ndTop
5%
Most Valuable International Artwork: 6,029thMost Influential: 6,435thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 8,058thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 8,696thMost Stationary: 9,880thLargest Black Market: 12,828thTop
10%
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 18,587thMost Pro-Market: 29,177th
Top
5%
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1st in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Populations: 1st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 2nd in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2nd in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 2nd in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 2nd in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 2nd in the regionSmartest Citizens: 2nd in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 2nd in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 2nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 2nd in the regionTop
10%
Largest Agricultural Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 3rd in the regionMost Cultured: 3rd in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 3rd in the regionMost Armed: 3rd in the regionMost Secular: 4th in the regionMost Avoided: 4th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 4th in the regionFattest Citizens: 4th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 5th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 5th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 5th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 5th in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 5th in the region

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