Spotlight on:

The Richly Blended Peoples of Koffee

“Guns, Germs, Steel, and really smooth Mochas!”

Overview • Factbook • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Richly Blended Peoples of Koffee is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Generalissimo Barista Espresso with an even hand, and renowned for its enslaved workforce, smutty television, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 40.451 billion Richly Blended Peopleses are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, is solely concerned with Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Full City. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Koffeean economy, worth an astonishing 35,588 trillion Cuppas a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Automobile Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Book Publishing. Average income is a breathtaking 879,793 Cuppas, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 8,241,928 per year while the poor average 7,897, a ratio of 1,043 to 1.

Diners regard burgers made from mechanically reclaimed cow protein as "proper meat", the Great Pyramid of Full City can be seen from miles away, Generalissimo Barista Espresso's media campaigns take a hiatus around exam week, and Brancaland has gifted over nine thousand putrid moose carcasses to Koffee as a reminder of their "special relationship". Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, probably because of the absence of a police force. Koffee's national animal is the Schrodingers Cat, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Koffee is ranked 227,379^th in the world and 73^rd in Wysteria for Most Primitive, scoring -1367.66 on the Scary Big Number Scale.

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