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The Dictatorship of Kinkinoia

“Linux is better than Windows”

Category: Psychotic Dictatorship
Civil Rights:
Unheard Of
Political Freedoms:

Location: 10000 Islands

Regional Influence: Hatchling


The Dictatorship of Kinkinoia is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Linus Torwalds with an iron fist, and renowned for its free-roaming dinosaurs, compulsory military service, and parental licensing program. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 1.137 billion Kinkinoians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tuxia. The average income tax rate is 79.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but stagnant Kinkinoian economy, worth 24.6 trillion marks a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, quite specialized black market in Woodchip Exports, Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 21,679 marks, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Being Linus Torwalds has been voted one of the top ten most dangerous jobs, the government's official stance on religion is that it is so very silly, historical commemorations regularly devolve into militaristic jingoism, and Linus Torwalds has just been declared ruler of Kinkinoia in an international press conference. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kinkinoia's national animal is the penguin, which can occasionally be seen avoiding garbage in the nation's murky oceans.

Kinkinoia is ranked 98,306th in the world and 805th in 10000 Islands for Most Subsidized Industry, scoring 924.7 on the Gilded Widget Scale.

Most Authoritarian: 2,642ndTop
Most Income Equality: 3,550thMost Conservative: 12,674thMost Patriotic: 12,778thTop
Highest Average Tax Rates: 15,955thSafest: 23,010thMost Corrupt Governments: 23,227thMost Secular: 23,482ndMost Extreme: 24,338thLowest Crime Rates: 25,648th
Most Authoritarian: 4th in the regionMost Extreme: 6th in the regionTop
Most Income Equality: 16th in the regionMost Conservative: 60th in the regionTop
Most Patriotic: 117th in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 126th in the regionMost Primitive: 129th in the region

National Happenings

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