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The Republic of Kelvenya is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Vladimir Markov with an iron fist, and renowned for its zero percent divorce rate, pith helmet sales, and daily referendums. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 3.791 billion Kelvenyans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Montrevia. The average income tax rate is 67.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Kelvenyan economy, worth 382 trillion Kelvenyan anovs a year, is quite specialized and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Trout Farming, Tourism, and Cheese Exports. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 100,845 Kelvenyan anovs, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

Sales of fishnet stockings have reached a record high, many suspect that the 'Whinny The Plop' children's magazine contains covert criticism of Vladimir Markov, the richest individuals apparently buy nothing but noodles and toilet paper, and metal detectors at school gates make sure that teenagers are carrying at least one sidearm. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kelvenya's national animal is the Siberian wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Orthodox Christianity.

Kelvenya is ranked 45,161^st in the world and 1^st in Yajib for Largest Black Market, with 25.8 trillion Standard Monetary Units.