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The Federal Commonwealth of Kazakh Astana

“Tñ Act'h' màqù Alqùñb”

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The Federal Commonwealth of Kazakh Astana is a colossal, socially progressive nation, ruled by Amÿr Tÿmñr with an even hand, and remarkable for its museums and concert halls, pith helmet sales, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, humorless population of 9.185 billion Astan are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, corrupt, socially-minded government prioritizes Defense, with Education, Administration, and Industry also on the agenda, while Spirituality receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Rÿhqèqal' Bȳyev'ctah'. The average income tax rate is 99.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Astan economy, worth a remarkable 3,886 trillion Tehqèqèrÿals a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, quite specialized black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Tourism. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 423,181 Tehqèqèrÿals, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Schools have extensive counseling programs for troubled students, the best spies are positively radiant after completing a big mission, high-tech infantry rifles automatically reload when the soldier shoots outside the screen of their helmet HUD, and the official Astan Phrase Book weighs as much as a small child. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Kazakh Astana's national animal is the Astan Brown Bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Alqùreamqỳñtáÿßem.

Kazakh Astana is ranked 3,159^th in the world and 1^st in Venice for Highest Economic Output, with 3,886 trillion Standard Monetary Units.

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