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The Battle of Gaugamela

“Alexander the Great vs. Darius III of Persia”

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
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Location: Gaugamela

Regional Influence: Hermit


The Battle of Gaugamela is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Alexandros Magnos with an iron fist, and renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, ritual sacrifices, and public floggings. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 28.627 billion Gaugamelans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Gaugamela. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 24.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Gaugamelan economy, worth a remarkable 6,134 trillion bloods a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Automobile Manufacturing, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Black market activity is extensive. Average income is an amazing 214,286 bloods, with the richest citizens earning 9.2 times as much as the poorest.

Every citizen sounds like a television news anchor, retirement apartments house giggling grannies who delightedly watch blank TVs all day long, stuttering trypanophobes are doomed never to marry, and political shows are fit for purpose. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Gaugamela's national animal is the soldier, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Hellenism.

Gaugamela is ranked 30,141st in the world and 1st in Gaugamela for Most Patriotic, with 27.77 flags saluted per person per day.

Largest Insurance Industry: 632ndLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1,246thHighest Economic Output: 1,749thHighest Disposable Incomes: 2,486thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 2,708thTop
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2,881stLargest Populations: 3,513thLargest Black Market: 3,713thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 3,739thMost Avoided: 3,813thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 5,323rdMost Efficient Economies: 5,371stMost Devout: 5,797thMost Corrupt Governments: 5,924thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 5,967thHighest Average Incomes: 6,132ndLargest Mining Sector: 6,551stFattest Citizens: 7,004thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 7,176thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 7,380thMost Subsidized Industry: 8,804thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 9,173rdLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 10,446thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 10,722ndMost Advanced Defense Forces: 10,939thLowest Crime Rates: 11,781stLargest Retail Industry: 12,944thTop
Largest Governments: 15,656thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 19,068thMost Developed: 19,799thLargest Information Technology Sector: 20,130thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 21,722ndMost Scientifically Advanced: 22,084th

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